Hey readers. I would apologize for writing about myself in this next post, but I write it not to brag, but to encourage you. That awkward transition between spring and summer can be tough – I know. But because of Jesus, you never have to miss out on life abundantly (on His terms, of course, because His are better), so don’t miss out. 1 Chronicles 16:8 and says, “Give praise to the LORD, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done.” So here goes.

I haven’t written a legit blog post on here since… whenever. I’m super busy. But I don’t care. Jesus says not to fear because He has overcome the world, and I think that includes time.

Speaking of time, my spring semester didn’t seem to have much of it. I took seventeen credits worth of classes, not to mention an outreach class I took with my church. I also become a leadership apprentice with The Rock, my campus ministry.

It was overwhelming at first. The night after my first leadership meeting, I ran to the basement to crying and complaining to God. He showed me that I didn’t have to do everything, and even the stuff I did have to do, I didn’t have to do it all at once. There were times when I didn’t get any time to myself, no time to think. It was often this mindless routine and I didn’t know what I was doing or whether any of my hard work was worth it.

Calling on the name of the Lord is like when you’re in a wrestling or grappling match and you’re losing big time and you’re in so much pain that you don’t even know what vices are holding you and you’re closing your eyes because you just don’t know how to get out of this one – but then you tap out and suddenly there is peace. It’s true – you’ve lost the fight, and you’ve surrendered. You are still in pain, but those vices no longer have a hold on you.

When I’m busy, it’s not the business that defines who I am. It’s good to keep a good attitude, but even a good attitude can’t win a fight. Instead of trying to win all the time, I have been trained to surrender. And remarkably, it worked this last semester.

Many of you know that I was a complete nerd in high school, and homework was my priority. I would often skip youth group and social events and family time to do homework. I was always able to finish every assignment, and I never ditched a class. Why? For no noble reason – it was just comfortable. If I didn’t do my homework or go to class… well, I wouldn’t know what would happen, but it would be annoying and unfamiliar.

I learned later how selfish this was – watching my own back, forgetting what matters in life, idolizing my work. Idolizing control.

Thankfully, God showed me that life is much easier when you lose control. I picture one of those cartoons where the character is so afraid of drowning that they’re flapping around like a maniac and don’t even realize that they’re in a kiddie pool, and there is plenty of firm ground to stand on.

This is what happened during my semester. God quieted my soul. He said, “Megan, calm down. Don’t you know that I know what you need? Don’t you know that I have it all? And because I have you, you have everything you need in Me. Remember what I told you: Love Me with everything you are, and love your neighbor as yourself. All of that other stuff you’re doing? Don’t worry about it. I gotcha.”

This is why there was a change in me. Because of the support from my discipleship team (provided by Mr. Genius Himself), I started to spend more time with my hall mates, my classmates, and my D-team. More importantly, I spent more time with Jesus. When I was feeling overwhelmed and I got into another mindless routine, I left. Prayer took the form of a bike ride to my favorite spot along the Spring Creek Trail to journal, or a couple pages cranked out on my laptop of what I like to call “soul-puking.”

I lost sleep, ditched class, skipped homework assignments, wore the same clothes a couple days in a row, and yes – let my split ends grow split ends (at least Einstein’s hair was curly so it would stay out of his face). God reminded me of His promise that if I seek first the Kingdom and His righteousness, all of the things I need will be taken care of (Matthew 6:33). God’s got me!

I invested, therefore, in the only things I know here to be eternal: God and people. I sought them first, and sought myself and my grades second.

I’m not sure exactly how lives were changed because of what I did, but I learned in Arizona that God hides fruit from us sometimes so that we don’t boast. Again, it was God who transformed my priorities. He is the one who released the vice of watching my own back so that when I tap out, even though I lose the fight, I would have lost by myself in there anyway.

But it’s not a complete loss either, and that’s where my metaphor, like Darwin’s theory, absolutely breaks down. I’ll cut the details of the semester here, but I just got my grades back tonight, and I got four A’s and one B+. I don’t deserve this, and it’s not because of what I did. God just throws these blessings out sometimes.

I’m not telling you that there is some 5-step process to get everything you want. But I’m telling you that if you go to God, you will get everything that you need and more, and that, guaranteed, it won’t turn out the way you wanted, but that you will like it anyway. When you trade in sustenance for abundance, it’s always is worthwhile tradeoff.

I’m now at another point in my life where I’m tempted to work for sustenance and for the good of myself, but I’m writing this blog instead of sleeping because I’m hoping that it will be a good tradeoff.  But again, that hope’s fulfillment doesn’t depend on me.

So what do you say? Let’s trade in sustenance for abundance. Tap out of the way you’re living, and see what happens. Do you think you’re in control, or are you comfortable? Maybe what you think you want is not what you need. Don’t work to please people or yourself (I am a hypocrite when I tell you this, because I might be in the midst of this right now). Know that God is already pleased with you. Make room for Jesus to show up.

I’ll leave you with one last challenge from Mr. Genius Himself:

“‘Test me in this,’ says the LORD Almighty, ‘and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.'” ~Malachi 3:10b