I’ve been watching Jeremy Larson evolve as a musician for a few years now. I first found his name as I was listening to Eisley’s album, Currents, which I was obsessed with when I wrote this blog post.

Of late, I have been utterly baffled by the artistry of Jeremy Larson​’s Violents EPs.

source: @jeremylarson

source: @jeremylarson

Jeremy Larson produced the string arrangements for the entirety of “Currents.” I love Eisley and their sound… but what would this album be without Jeremy Larson’s contributions? They’re really what drew me to “Drink the Water” in the first place. A few years later and I’ve:

  • been to an Eisley concert,
  • bought an album,
  • bought a record,

and now I’m pretty sure I’m gonna buy everything Jeremy ever comes out with from this point forward.

The “Violents” project is a set of 4 EP’s he produced with all-female singers —
something he had never done before.

It truly is an innovative project. The sound of each EP is unique, not only in that each vocalist has a unique sound, but each installment moves from ethereal to haunting to electronic to nostalgic —
seemingly incompatible moods
that all flow seamlessly
from one installment
to the next.

One vocalist on this project is Olga Yagolnikov Phelan, the Estonian front-woman of Kye Kye.

source: @violentsmusic

source: @violentsmusic

(Everyone who’s ever gotten in a car with me is either in love with or absolutely sick of Kye Kye’s “Fantasize.”)

Fun fact: Guess who did all the string arrangements on “Fantasize?”

Yep. Jeremy Larson.

source: @jeremylarson

source: @jeremylarson

Another vocalist is one of the front-women of Eisley: Stacy Dupree King. I admire both Kye Kye and Eisley because they’re truly family bands. Kye Kye consists of two siblings, Olga’s husband, and a longtime friend. Eisley is four siblings and a cousin, many of whom travel all over together with all their kiddos who are all best friends. The Dupree family is incredibly musical, and if you’re a Dupree kid and not in Eisley, you’re probably in Merriment or some kick-butt solo project. And if you’re married to a Dupree kid, you probably also have an amazing musical background.

source: @violentsmusic

source: @violentsmusic

Stacy has been busy not only with Eisley and her drummer husband Darren (of Mutemath), but also just produced her first full-length solo album, “When We Were Young,” under the name Sucré.

Jeremy himself has an amazing family: his wife Elsie Larson is a blogger and is constantly flooding my Instagram feed with beautiful images of some interior design project or other from her lifestyle blog, A Beautiful Mess.

source: @jeremylarson

source: @jeremylarson

Jeremy and Elsie’s excellence in creativity and appreciation for beauty might just save the world.

source: @jeremylarson

source: @jeremylarson

So there’s Jeremy, Olga, and Stacy…
And there’s Annie.

source: @violentsmusic

source: @violentsmusic

Annie Williams was the vocalist for not one, but two Violents EP’s, and was, according to Jeremy, a huge part of the inspiration he needed to make this album. Annie has a fairly low profile on line in terms of her music, but part of that is because she now owns a company that designs beautiful leather bags.

And it’s one of Annie’s songs that I would like to showcase here. I’d like to move from the artists’ stories into the story this song tells. Because it was at first very cryptic to me, and when I discovered the irony of it, I needed to tell somebody. But. Before I forget:

Stream all the music: http://violentsmusic.com/
Follow all the Instagrammers:
@violentsmusic
@jeremylarson
@elsielarson
@annwilliams_
@kyekyemusic
@sucremusic
@eisleyofficial

“Fireflies” // Violents, Jeremy Larson, & Annie Williams

After the ball dropped on New Years Eve
I’m barefoot and running down Swallow Street
My head is bleeding, I’m unaware
I start blacking out and I’m losing air

I thought that I’d grow up and grow out of this
I fall in love like a nervous tick
I gave you the one thing you could not have earned
The years of my youth you can not return

The only thing I know for sure
This has to do with you and her

You wrote this script, I lived in it so take a bow
And look me in the eye and say you’re proud
My captor and my rescue, you have played them well
Tonight I will escape all by myself

As I lie down in the frozen street
I see that your shadow lies next to me
This memory comes from a clear summer night
There’s an ocean of fireflies swimming the sky

I’m dead or dreaming I don’t care
But leave my body resting here

A lifetime ago, in the blink of an eye
I sat down beside you on a clear summer night
I start letting go and concede to the sky
And breathe in and out just a couple more times

Life moves slowly and suddenly

Decoding this song to me was like reading a murder mystery. Because this song is about a beautiful relationship, an affair, a discovery, a betrayal, and finally, a murder.

It only made sense to me why this project was called “Violents” after I listened to this song. Although its one of the slowest songs, it is actually a very violent scenario.  It only had to be slowed down to capture the emotion of it, and the helplessness felt by the character singing it.

A woman dies traumatically on New Year’s Day and, as she lay dying, has a flashback to a peaceful day in summer. Both this death and this happy memory have something in common… But what is it? The memories flash through her mind — the regrets, the pieces of the puzzle… she struggles to piece them together to make any kind of sense out of this.

Source: annie-williams.com

Source: annie-williams.com

“I fall in love like a nervous tick…” She was in love. But she came a a realization that it was a naive choice. She is mad at herself for letting herself get into the situation in which she currently finds herself… betrayed and murdered.

“You and her.” He had an affair. She knew about it before her death, but suspected it even moreso tonight.

“You wrote this script, I lived in it so take bow / And you look me in the eye and say you’re proud.” He lied. He was playing a part. He was hiding something. But this deceitful lie he composed… was her life. She was living it as if it were real.

“I gave you… the years of my youth” They grew up together. Or perhaps, have at least known each other since they were quite young.

“A lifetime ago, in the blink of an eye” — A flashback.

“I start letting go and concede to the sky / And breathe in and out just a couple more times” Her soul is leaving her body.

The “fireflies” are the stars…
And here is where the irony comes.

The same “fireflies” she saw with him on that “peaceful summer night” are the same starts she stared at on that street on the day she died.

“Tonight I will escape all by myself.”

To her, the final escape from this false story comes only through death. Only in this way is the man both her “captor” — holding her inside this lie — and her “rescuer” — the one to finally relinquish her from the prison of the life he had kept her in. In the end, she is left alone, perhaps the only one living in truth and not living a lie.

“Life moves slowly and suddenly.” 
This is her only conclusion. Did she conclude that she made a mistake to love him? To be vulnerable? To believe him? To trust him? Does she blame him? Is she angry? Bitter? Did she forgive him? None of these are apparent. But what is apparent is that she had no control over what would become of him. And so, she provides this weak, paradoxical conclusion: The times they enjoyed together lasted years… and were lost in only a moment.

Loss. Betrayal. Anything can be ripped apart in only a moment. A relationship. A life. Trust.
Will justice prevail? And how much control do we really have over it? How much control were we meant to have?
Sometimes it takes the death of something to realize the truth…

I was trying to find some amazing conclusion from this song. but it’s really just an unresolved murder case. We live in this tension in which justice is not served, and we believe in lies, and we trust people, and those people hurt us. This is the reality in which we live. And maybe that’s why I resonate with this song. There aren’t any sure answers. But there is this longing for justice and resolution. Why? Is this longing built into us? If so, why? Were we meant to experience it? And if we were, why don’t we experience it? Will we ever? I believe we will. But for now, here we are.

Living in the tension,
watching the
fireflies.