I am currently reading through a book called Because He Loves Me by Elyse Fitzpatrick. I have a few thoughts I wanted to share from it (even though they’re really just what the gospel has already said). There is so much more in this book than I’m going to write about, and this book is so packed with truth that, if you read it, God will assuredly find a way to renew the way you think about and live out the gospel. You should read it. Okay, I’m done advertising.


It’s not just that we were saved a long time ago when we were younger. Every single day we need God’s redemption, we need to know that we are at peace with him, and that he loves us. He didn’t just save us thinking, “Oh, there she goes, being her stupid old self. I better take the rap for her yet again… *sigh*.”

What kind of Father do I think he is? I have no idea who I’m dealing with! I pretend I know how God works when I don’t even understand myself. I’ve heard it all before, but I live as if I’ve never heard it all. Not all, because I miss what it really means for me right now.

God rescued me, but he didn’t just drop me on the ground – he held me in his arms. Not only did he take away the bad (namely Hell, which is where we would despair forever with no hope of ever getting better) – but he has given me everything good! It’s not just some place in the sky – since there has been a death already, our inheritance is already available to us today!

If we truly lived like this were true (and it is!), think of how much more joyful our lives would be! Maybe we would really enjoy life like any true parent would want for their child to do. God wants us to experience life, and life to the full. Are you experiencing that right now? If not, just a guess, but I bet it’s because you’re dwelling in despair over what you think is your identity, what you’re believing defines who are you are at your very core.


For about a month now, I’ve been despairing over feeling far from God, trusting in my own works, and not knowing what to do. I tried to keep doing things in order to understand that my hope doesn’t come from me doing things! It was a paradox, and I couldn’t get out. Like one of those bear traps that just clamps tighter the more you strive and strive. So I was really desperate, my mind was embarrassingly distracted, and I was pretty depressed, especially since my job has been hard and I’ve been low on sleep, and also struggling with some sin.

I’ve been trying to find grace, to understand what it means. And it found me this week, but I was really angry and resentful at first. So I read in this book that when God looks at me, because of Jesus Christ, He sees someone who is completely innocent. He sees someone who always does things that are pleasing to him, someone who lives only to help point others to God, and someone who consistently lays down her life for others. He even sees me as someone who is perfect!

I read this and wondered if it was biblical. And then I realized it was. Which sucks. Because it’s not true – it can’t be! I mean, obviously, I’m not even close to perfect. I prayed at God: “…Are you kidding me? What are you, delusional? Don’t you SEE me? This filth that I’ve been living in?”

I read it again: “In God’s opinion (the only one that matters!) that’s your record today.” The only one that matters? And today? Not just after I die and I’m finally out of this stupid body?

She was right! In the metaphor of marriage, it doesn’t matter who else I look beautiful to, but if my husband thinks I’m beautiful, then that’s all that matters. …So maybe it’s me who’s delusional about my identity. I’ve pretty much been going crazy lately as it is. And I mean, whose opinion is more correct – a sinful, misled person without understanding? Or God, who is perfect and sees everything for what it really is?

Yup, I mess up, every single day. Still. I get really tired of it. But, I guess, how I could I even have the audacity to say that Jesus was not good enough for me? That His act of love for me was not enough? That anything I do could be stronger that what Jesus already finished?

I’ll borrow an analogy from Elyse Fitzpatrick: let’s say your mother works like crazy to store up savings as an inheritance for you. You can do what you want with it. Did I mention it’s a really big inheritance? So when she passes away, you decide to keep that money in the bank, and you live like a poor person, begging on the streets for the rest of your life. What would your mother think of how you handled the product of all of her love and hard work? This would not be a loving gesture towards her, would it? No, it actually appears quite unappreciative, if not hateful!

In the same way, God has all of these things that he has blessed us with, and we live like we don’t have them, because we’re too entangled in our sins and struggles – we’re already preoccupied holding up signs on the streets, saying, “don’t you see how poor I am?” When God’s saying, “Yes, I do! I can’t bear to see you this way! … But you know what? You’re wrong – you are not poor. Look what I’ve given you.” But we must take our eyes off our shame and guilt first.

Guilt a rather self-reliant emotion in general. Guilt says that we could have done it on our own, and that we still wish that we could have done so – without God. Guilt says that we wish we didn’t need God, or whoever happens to be loving us at the time. Do you ever feel guilty when someone serves you, in your daily life, where your true beliefs are played out? I do. What are our excuses? “You didn’t have to do that.” “Oh, I could have done that!” “Are you sure? Let me do ___ for you” (because obviously it’s about getting them back, not accepting their love!).

The guilt doesn’t pay for your sin, nor does it add any more to the payment Jesus has made for you. He died so you wouldn’t have to feel that way, but so you could drop that sin and that guilt and go dine out with Him!

God has given us a new identity. We are no longer poor, but we have it all. We are no longer slaves to sin, so why are we living that way? You are free from guilt! There is no condemnation for you! No, I’m serious. You never have to feel guilty again. Jesus paid it all. Done.

I honestly believe that there is never – and I mean never – a time when God really wants us to feel shame or guilt. Thou shalt feel guilty? No. Just no. Correct me if I’m wrong. Even when we sin, he wants us to rejoice in who Christ is! This guy loves me that much more! This guy saved me from that much more despair!

When we dwell in guilt, we’re only giving Satan one more victory over us. Do you believe that God wants you to be happy – I mean, ultimately? Even His discipline is dealt “so that [our] joy may be complete.” Do you believe that God loves you? Do you believe that God loves you? Do you really live your life believing that God is just completely in love with you? So why do you try so hard to negate that love with self-hatred? Don’t push him away. If you’re living as if you’re still in slavery, you’re in a wrestling match against with God – no wonder you’re so tired all the time!

My friend, rest in him. Let him rescue you and hold you in his arms. You never have to doubt him again.